Women tend to be their own harshest critics. We often doubt ourselves or second guess our decisions, motives and abilities. Often that doubt can be as a result of comparing ourselves to our competitors or fellow business women. I see many articles about ways to become ‘the expert’ in your field, and while that might be feasible or desirable, it is not an essential component, or a measure of, success.
So while striving to be better, learning from others and being mentored by those with more expertise than us, are all great actions to take as a woman in business, you need to assess your motivation. If your motivation for doing those things is because you doubt your own abilities and are seeking instead to emulate others, you are unlikely to find success.
Self-confidence is a common trait of successful business women. This doesn’t mean they know all the answers or never make mistakes. And it doesn’t mean that they are necessarily ‘the best’ at what they do in order to have that self-confidence. They have just learnt that doubts have a way of eating away at confidence and stifling the abilities you do have.
Theodore N Vail had a good way of viewing doubt: “Real difficulties can be overcome; it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable.”. Or another way of looking at it, there are enough things to worry about without also adding your doubts to the equation!
This quote by Vincent Van Gogh is also a really lovely way to approach your doubts. He said “If you hear a voice within you say you cannot paint, then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.”. Don’t give your unfounded doubts a voice.
Michelle Grice writes a weekly column for business women in The Western Weekender